well - what a wonderful week it has been! highlights from this past week include:
: meeting my WONDERFUL new big sis Constance. she’s the best.
: an amazing Thanksgiving-feast-times-a thousand meal with the alums. the setting was a beautiful plantation home, tucked away at the end of a windy driveway. included in the plantation - horses. and as if on cue, they were galloping through the side yard as we pulled up.
: getting even closer with my 57 new sisters as we became official, sharing cheesecake with my dad at the reception, and standing in the candle-lit circle with former member/best friend/role model - my mom.
and those are just the highlights. every last minute was filled with joy, challenge, and excitement. i love college.
but what really matters: Jesus and His goodness. the King is enthralled by the inner-most being of each of us. and we won over His heart before we were even created. He knew us before we were physically existing and had compassion on us through the cross. Thank you, Lord.
—> He has been showing me this week about the importance of surrender. maybe it is college’s fault - or more realistically my own - but my perspective lately has been so greatly in the future. i have been thinking about classes for next semester, scheming trips with friends in the spring, frustrating myself with summer plans… if it is monday, i am thinking about my test on thursday. if it is saturday, i am thinking about how i am going to do laundry/homework/exercise/church/etc etc on sunday. i think the picture has been painted clear enough.
this does not sound like a big deal. and from the world’s perspective it really isn’t. planning and time management are great things. BUT - this is a tiny part of my heart that the Lord has drawn out and wants me to give back to Him. do i really trust that His plans - each and every plan from having clean clothes sunday to making a decent grade on thursday - are good for me? that ultimately, this life is a breath, and that i should be pouring myself out on behalf of the poor, the afflicted, the broken instead of worrying whether or not i have an hour period during the day that i can use to go for a run?
surrender: to give up or hand over, to abandon oneself entirely
in order to gain REAL life - minus the striving, scheming, and stressing - i have to abandon myself entirely. surrender every fear of what’s to come, every one of my plans for the day, every hope and every dream to Jesus because He cares. He really truly cares for each of us. He promises life and life abundant. He says that if we cling to our lives, we will lose it —- not because He wants to punish us for being in control —- but because in surrender comes eternal, abundant, and fulfilling life.
[Luke 17:33, John 10:10]
- an excerpt from the devtional Jesus Calling:
“trust Me enough to let things happen without striving to predict or control them… when you project yourself into the future, rehearsing what you will do or say, you are seeking to be self-sufficient: to be adequate without My help. don’t divide your life into things you an do by yourself and things that require My help - instead, learn to rely on Me in every situtation.”